Today I had been thinking about alot of things....thinking whether to go back not...thinking for the whole day...but still no conclusion....if I go back..do I have the time?? I don't know...so paranoid....what am I gonna do....if I go back...I will need to learn again...but what if I fail to do it...I gave up all the hopes 3years ago...should I return?....I really don't know...I'm afraid that things might go back the same as before...how am I going to face it again...was thinking alot..hope to have a conclusion...when I opened up the book...temptation is there...I don't know what should I do...if I go back...I will need to start all over again...learn from a basic...how?? I don't want to see lives departing from this world....I can't accept the fact that I failed again and again...what am I gonna do....I can't accept that the fact that they departed from this world is all because of a little mistake I made....I am afraid that my careless mistake will cost life....thinking of so much things....end of August...coming soon...September make things worse....can't write liao...more paranoid...byezz