After these few days...I finally come to a conclusion that no point going on like this...having a love life like mine is like surving on a diet of hope...Liking someone is real tired....surving in this realistic world..where no one give a damn....longing for someone is even worse...just continue my life not caring about the other side of me is better....need not suffer so much like now....sometime when I call everyday...maybe you might not find me bothering...but still sometime I find myself a bother...I wonder how come you don't find me a bother...am i too sensitive or over paranoid....I don't know...haiz....maybe should find something to do...better than nothing to do...maybe should start learning now as you pin so much hope on me to learn..until now I still learn that little.......something I should hold on yet I hold on to nonsense for so long.....sad to say I don't believe in god so my life I will have to walk it out myself alone....should be contented that at least I still have this little boi at home with me these few years maybe you can only accompany me another few more years....some people only know how to "talk" about others and when they are good for nothing...maybe in academic...ya I totally a loser but doesn't mean that in other thing I lose to you...in appearance why...pls look in the mirror..you are nothing better also...ya...In height I lose to you but SO WHAT...I bloody hell don't care....anyway stop these thingy...don't waste my time....anyway I just hope that from May..my life will change for better....