After a tearful and sleepless night, I realize that things are going kinda out of way. Everything seems so different now and I'm afraid what's going to happen will end our friendship. We're getting kinda used to one another and getting closer each day, everytime when my feelings start to swing away I tried to remind myself again and again what happened previously during March and April. I wouldn't wanna go through that kind o pain again and another blow of sorrow might just shattered my heart again beyond repaired. I tried to tell myself not to think too much or not to foresee anything cause this game is unpredictable and any moment the rule will change and nothing will be the same again. Sometimes I'm afraid my concern and care towards you might end up forgetting about my own safety. Each step I take, I'm constantly reminding myself that not to expect anything and again I need to remind myself of my initial intention was just friends and nothing more than that. Anything more than a friend will cause unimaginable ending. I tried to hold back my emotion but you noticed I'm not being myself. If I don't know how to take control of my emotion, things might end up badly and in the end both of us will be hurt. I need sometime to sort out my feelings and divert my attention, I can't afford to lose myself in a game of unwanted love.